Wednesday, July 4, 2012

You Can't Do That!

I've said it for years. One of the stupidest things you can say to a Correctional Officer is "You can't do that!"

That is pretty much guaranteeing that he is going to do it.

Or at least give it the old college try.

The Pshrinks had put one of the wobbleheads down in the Hive on an injected psych med that was supposed to help him calm down and behave himself for awhile. It's what we call "Forced meds", which means he has no choice but to take it.

They do a hearing to determine if an offender needs to have a forced med injection scheduled or not. Pshrinks, caseworkers and at least one judge. If they all agree, the judge signs a court order and this guy is getting a butt full of Haldol or whatever whether he wants it or not.

For the safety and security of the institution and for the well being of the offender himself and society at large.

Sometimes they just cuff up and take it. Sometimes they fight. But they always end up taking their medicine in the end.

Horrible pun there intended.

We had one down in the Hive that was supposed to get a forced med shot and he was resisting. Wouldn't come cuff up for the nurse. Refused.

Since I was on the yard I gave Lt Beez a ride down to the Hive and I tagged along just for kicks. He went to the guys door and told him either he was going to cuff up and take his shot or they were going to send a team down to come in and get him.

He said "You can't just come in here like that, man! This is my own private cell!"

What the......

Hee hee hee hee hee hee hee!

OMFGawd what a freaking idiot!

That statement would pretty much prove for all time and with no uncertainty that he was bona fidely crazy as a pink dumpster in the china cabinet.

No offense to any of you who might actually have a pink dumpster in the china cabinet, of course. Just making an observation.

Anyway, after Lt Beez tried a few more times to make him cooperate, he went off to make the call to put a movement team together.

Walking out behind him I made my best maniacal laugh while he looked back at me with a worried look on his face. I always cackle like that when there is epic tomfoolery afoot.

Unfortunately for the entertainment value, once he looked out and saw five guys dressed in riot gear fixing to come in and clean his clock, he relented and submitted to the shot.

I wasted one of my best maniacal laughs for nothing. Ah, well. There's always the next day.

Things are getting stupid and crazy again. Supposedly they found three shanks on B-side this afternoon and somebody got stuck. That just aint cool.

It's way too hot to be fooling around like that.

Here's the weekend lineup:
Wednesday is going to be National Country Music Day and Tom Sawyer Fence-Painting Day as well as National Barbecued Spareribs Day.

Thursday will be Workaholics Day, Bikini Day and National Apple Turnover Day.

Friday will be National Fried Chicken Day, International Kissing Day and Take Your Favorite Blogger To Lunch Day.

Okay, I may have fibbed there just a little.

Worth a shot...


  1. Heh. Reminds me of a sort of friend of mine. Won't go into detail - but yep, at some stage in his life, parked on the "outside" and given "treatment" and 'prescription' drugs (to 'calm him down').

    Was back in he 70's ... but riding as a passenger in his motor vehicle was interesting.

    Would park it wherever he saw a space.

    His response to the comment
    "you can't do that!" Was;
    "Whaddya mean, have just done it".

    NOT something that i would 'recommend' ..
    but yep ... some limits need to be tested.

    1. Davoh- Sometimes the world needs people like that, just to wake them up out of that "You can't do that" kind of mindset.

  2. Where we going for lunch?

    Better not be Fried Chicken...just had some Sunday; could do BBQ Ribs - just sayin'!

    Oh...just read the part about fibbing...hmmm...was really looking forward to those ribs!

    And...sorry to read about the "wasted maniacal laughter"...bummer - there's always next time, and you know there's going to be a next time, it's a given.

  3. It's my understanding that the shanks were made from materials broken off some of the interior perimeter fencing and were hidden in or around trees in the yard before being retrieved by the offender to begin his attack. Of course we search constantly inside the housing units for contraband, including potential weapons, but apparently we need to devote more effort to searching in the yards.

    1. Coupe- It's the first real nastiness we've had in a long while. Maybe it was time for a wake up call, eh?