Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Crunching The Numbers

I was out in front of dining the other day, taking my knuckleheads to chow, when Sergeant Major drove up on the cart to chat. He mentioned that we were getting six new OJT's starting on Monday.

I asked him how many he thought would end up staying or being worth the paper they were printed on.

He said maybe one. I replied that he was probably right. We've gotten some real poozers in some of the last groups of OJT's and hardly any of them have worked out.

We are lucky if we keep one in six. And double lucky if they turn out to be handy to have around and not just another semi-warm body to fill a space.

Tonight I was down an officer in my house. That snaphead Femur called out sick again and Lt Sienna didn't have anyone to send me. Then he called back later and said he was sending me two OJT's to make up for the loss.

Sometimes that works out well and sometimes it's more trouble that it's worth. I can't actually use them to fill a spot, but I can have them assist my officers when they need it.

One was a rehire. She used to work at another camp eight years ago then left to do other things. A lot of things have changed in eight years but she knew the basics and wasn't timid around the offenders so she was a real asset in the house this evening.

The other guy was new to the department, but handled himself like an old pro. Knew when to ask questions and when to lend a hand and when to stand back and watch. Says he was a professional diver for twenty years. I figure someone who can do that sort of thing that long and still be alive and in one piece must have a good head on their shoulders.

So we got two good ones. If we can just keep them long enough, we might just beat the odds.

That would be something.

Tuesday I'm going to be out on the yard and it's going to be blistering hot. I think I'll just skip the food and fill my lunchbox with frozen water bottles, gatorade and popsicles.

On top of that it's going to be Parent's Day, Uncommon Instruments Awareness Day and Jump For Jelly Beans Day.

Go ahead and jump....... Might as well jump!


  1. OJTs? Opposable joke thumbs? Only juxtaposable trespassers?

  2. Octopuses Juicing Turtles? Outgoing Jesus Tacticians? Orange Julius Treats?

  3. Bryan and Scott- On the Job Trainees.

    And I am going to come over there and smack the both of you.

  4. Damn, I missed Uncommon Instruments Awareness Day again! And now I've got Van Halen in my head!

    1. Lolamouse- Hey, at least it's something you can groove to.