Thursday, February 12, 2009

We'll Take The Win

It will go down in the record books as a win for our side. The newest PB has seen the error of his ways and given in. Even as late as this afternoon he was still acting the fool, trying to flood his cell and just being a general ass.

But this evening he took his meal loaf and ate it and declared he was done playing. He hadn't eaten anything in a day or so and was probably pretty hungry. He laid down and behaved himself for the rest of the evening. We'll see if it lasts.

And I didn't have the heart to tell him he had won himself eight more days of the loaf.

He said he just wanted to go to a C-5 camp and do his time. The stupid kid was in for a 120 day shock program. Now he's in for four years of hard time among dangerous idiots and officers who are way less willing to put up with his shenanigans that we are.

He's most likely going to get thumped a time or two. Or worse. Ah, well. It was his decision.

Me, I'm going to take the win and move on.

Hope he liked the loaf.


  1. "Meal loaf, it's what for supper." And breakfast, and lunch......

  2. What do you do when someone goes on a hunger strike?

  3. BA- I thought about telling the schmuck last night that he had like 24 more meal loaves to go before he was done... But then I figured you'd rather tell him yourself. I think he'll snap.

    Guy- They usually give up in a day or so. I think I'll make a whole post on that today.

  4. Is the loaf bad because its just so bland? Or is there another reason they don't like it? Maybe I'm not getting the "punishment" aspect of the loaf.

    I'm curious, what can an inmate have in their cell, and what is contraband? I am thinking about stuff to pass the time - books, music? What do inmates do to pass the time(besides think up new ways to be stupid)?
    Thanks for the blog. Big laughs!

  5. Papias,
    The loaf consists of hamburger, beans, vegetables, bread and powdered milk all blended together and baked into a meatloaf looking concoction. It's basically a pyschological ploy. The only thing they look forward to in the hole is their meals, and we take this enjoyment away from them. I've actually tried it, and while I wouldn't order it from a menu, it's not too terrible.

    In our Adseg Unit, the offenders are allowed mail, books, magazines, but no TV or radio. As hard as it is to believe, some don't even read. They just sit in that 6x9 cell, some for as long as 90 days at a time, and do absolutely nothing but sleep. And they seem to enjoy it 'cause they're always in the hole. Contraband is anything there not specifically allowed to have per policy and includes tobacco, lighters, pencils, food, or anything that has been altered in anyway.

  6. I KNOW for a fact I work in a different state than you but I swear it is like reading about my own prison. We had 3 poop smearers in the past couple weeks. And here, it is called (wait for it) "Nutra-loaf." Like it is some health food. It is so rarely used most staff have NO idea it even exists. Rumor has it that it is a blend of whatever food they have that partiuclar night, pureed up, and baked. So the "flavor" changes according to whatever is being served. I have never laid eyes on it myself but I am pretty sure it does truly exist. We usually just give them sandwiches in obs.

    God this is weird reading your's like the inmates have a national underground publication with a daily agenda that instructs them how many smear and/or flood. Perhaps I will find out when I get tickets to AdSeg - the Musical. Why is it that the smearers never flood AFTER the said act of smearing.

  7. Icypup- Stupidity, it's universal. It's what keeps those little bitty paychecks coming. And they usually flood first just to get our attention and when that doesn't work, then they smear. BA says they have a roster of who is going to be the poop smearer. I think they just pick the youngest and the stupidest and tell them to do it.

    And believe it or not, FM and I are working on lyrics for the musical. No promises about a date, but progress is being made.

  8. Nutra-loaf. That's good. I'll bet you could sell it in health food stores and make a fortune. Some places it's also called Confinement Loaf.

    A loaf by any other name would still taste like spoiled dog food.