Friday, March 4, 2011

Is There Any Justice?

I was going to write about the terrific thunderstorm we were presently surviving and how I managed to get through the night and the tarantula downpour and got home and my feet were still dry.

But right in between the words "about" and "the" lightning hit somewhere real close and made all my power flicker. I'm so happy that I invested a couple of years ago and bought those battery backup thingys for the computers and our wireless internet hub.

Anyway, I had the post all written in my head but when I got home, I found this email in my box from a guy who I used to work with in Raccoon City and has since retired.

It reads like this:


Let's put the seniors in jail and the criminals in nursing homes.

This would correct two things in one motion:

Seniors would have access to showers, hobbies and walks.

They would receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical treatment, wheel chairs, etc.

They would receive money instead of having to pay it out.

They would have constant video monitoring, so they would be helped instantly... if they fell or needed assistance.

Bedding would be washed twice a week and all clothing would be ironed and returned to them.

A guard would check on them every 20 minutes.

All meals and snacks would be brought to them.

They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose.

They would have access to a library, weight / fitness room, spiritual counseling, a pool and education...and free admission to in-house concerts by nationally recognized entertainment artists. [Johnny Cash entertained often]

Simple clothing - i.e. shoes, slippers, pj's - and legal aid would be free , upon request.

There would be private, secure rooms provided for all with an outdoor exercise yard complete with gardens.

Each senior would have a TV, phone and radio in their room at no cost .

They would receive daily phone calls.

There would be a board of directors to hear any complaints and the ACLU would fight for their rights and protection.

The guards would have a code of conduct to be strictly adhered to, with attorneys available, at no charge to protect the seniors and their families from abuse or neglect.

As for the criminals:

They would receive cold food.

They would be left alone and unsupervised.

They would receive showers once a week.

They would live in tiny rooms, for which they would have to pay $5,000 per month.

They would have no hope of ever getting out.

"Sounds like justice to me!"

After reading that there's just not much more I could say. I'm all for it.

So tomorrow is Multiple Personalities Day. I almost wish I was going to be at work for that one. I know a few one man cells that are pretty crowded already.

Sunday is National Frozen Food Day. What could be better? Hey Ma! How about a big bag of Birdseye Frozen Peas?

And Monday will be National Crown Roast Of Pork Day. Hang on. Let me look that one up. Ah. It's one of those odd things where you wrap a rib roast around in a circle so it looks like a little crown. I get it. Does anybody even do that kind of thing anymore?

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