Thursday, December 29, 2011

No Crystal Ball In My Pocket

Well, I've been a Sergeant exactly two weeks now. Doesn't seem like it's been that long. I'm still surprised when I see that white shirt hanging on my closet door and I always startle myself by walking past a mirror. Especially with that immense sombrero of a hat on.

It's taking some getting used to. Even now when someone says "Hey, Sarge!" I'll look around in wonder and think "We have a Sergeant?"

Oh yeah, that's me.

It seems like a big part of the Sergeanting business is having information. There's never enough of it. And everyone seems to think I should have all of it at my fingertips. Now that I'm a supervisor I should know everything that's going on, at least in my zone.

Trust me, all I got was a new badge, a big hat, a new ID card and two days of unrelated training. Oh yeah, and the shirts. Can't forget about the new white shirts.

But they did not issue me a crystal ball. I don't know everything. I know the places to find out things, but I don't have all of the info necessary to run a prison stapled to the brim of my hat. The hat isn't quite that big.

But it's bloody close.

There was a phone call during mainline this evening. I wasn't close, so Sausage answered it then told me that an inmate from 8 house was going PC. That's all I got. Lt Farmer was across the room so I went and gave him a heads up that we would be locking one up.

He wanted to know the inmates name, number, and who was going to escort him to the Hive. As I went to find out he told me to also call Lt Baby Boy and give him the information. So I called 8 house and found out. When I called Lt BB, he wanted to know what cell he was from, whether or not he was packing his own property and whether or not he took any medications.

So I had to call back to 8 house again.....

It's a learning process. That's the kind of stuff I need to be able to find out quickly so I don't look like too much of a fool in front of my supervisors. I need to make a "Somebody is getting locked up" checklist in my head and get all of that together before I tell anybody anything.

I imagine there are a few other checklists I need to have made up as well.

Or I can just find me a miniature crystal ball somewhere and clip it to my duty belt between my keys and my pepper spray.

That might be easier.

By the way, a big shout of thanks to Sgt Smiley on day shift. He found an extra coffee pot in 10 house to replace the one I broke the other night. So now I won't get frowned at and it won't cost me fifteen bucks for a new one.

Yer a lifesaver, dude! Thanks!!!

So Thursday is going to be Pepper Pot Day, Tick Tock Day and No Interruptions Day.

Don't sneeze! (Sorry, it's all I had)


  1. You've done a lockup before, and/or called one in.
    Basically same information.

    Name & Number:
    Doe, John #1234567
    19E 123 Bed 2

    Main difference is instead of knowing where he's going [in the Hive], you need to know who's taking him.

  2. Vinnie- I know that. Just gotta find my equilibrium again. I'm off my square.

  3. What Vinnie said plus does he take meds and is he packing his own property.

  4. Just remember what they tell you when you work the fishbowl and you've got it made. I'ts the same information.