Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Security Issues

Security. That is our main concern.

Before we make the coffee.

Before we unpack our lunchboxes.

Before we decide to thump that #@&%*%!! inmate making all that noise over there.

We make sure that everything is secure. We check the keys, the doors, the fences, the gates, the turnstiles, the fire exits, and all of the equipment. When we shut a door or close a gate we rattle it to make sure it's locked. We check and double check and sometimes triple check.

Sometimes they are a little redundant and repetitious but we check anyway.

Don't want any of the little creeps getting loose and hurting one of us or, even worse, someone on the outside. The real citizens out there. Those are who we are protecting, even if they don't like us very much.

And it's a bloody good thing, sometimes that we do these checks. Tonight was a fair good example. Two things jumped out immediately that could have ruined my whole day. Maybe not so much, but they were alarming.

On my nights in the comm room I have to check the admin building twice a night. My first check through I found the records room unlocked. Oh snap. They make a big deal about that. Went and got Sgt Puddle and we made sure there was nobody in there before locking the door.

I think they just have inmate records in there, but I'm not sure. I've never been in there before and don't really care to know. According to Sarge there's lots of "Confidential Information" in there that I don't need to have access to.

As long as it's locked, I no longer care.

Then, on my turn out in the P-car I noticed that the gas company had been digging a hole outside the predator fence. In between the fence and the outer road where I drive. They had it all roped off with caution tape and the hole wasn't going towards the fence so I didn't pay it much attention.

Then on my way back around I saw something shiny so I shined the spotlight in there. They had left two shovels down in the hole. Jeez!

Let's see.... shovels. Hole. Prison Fence. Good idea or no?

Called Sgt Puddle again. he was getting tired of seeing my face at that point. Showed him the problem. he passed it on to the captain who called mental health and asked them to take care of it. The guy came out and got the shovels and took them back inside. I said "What were they thinking?" He just shook his head and replied "Frack if I know!"

Then, as I was hoping all the silliness had calmed down for one night, here comes the Watcher off the yard, heading for the evidence box, which is up by the comm room. Says one of the newer guys down in the Hive found a shank laying in D-wing. Looked like a piece of an oven rack or something. About seven inches long. Wrapped with a shoelace on one end for a handle. Sharp as hell. Nice.

On that note, I decided to retire to the comm room for the rest of the evening and not come back out, lest I find anything else. I knew that was secure because I had the key on my belt.

So tomorrow is National Butter Crunch Day. ??? Like Crunch-N-Munch or Screaming Yellow Zonkers or what? Normally I don't care for my butter if it's crunchy.

Hmph. We'll have to see about that one!


  1. At least the shovels were outside the fence, weren't they? That would really be something if they'd been digging in yard and knocked off for that day, saying, "We'll just leave the shovels here. What could happen?" Are we thinking friends on the outside?

    I worked security for years. Not in a prison; mostly industrial sites, but I know all about the constant checking of everything, just in case...

  2. Bryan- Yes, they were outside and I probably over reacted just a little. But so did everybody else when i mentioned it. So I felt a little better about it. Having those two items in such close proximity was just not a good idea.

  3. That hole near the prison fence definitely isn't good news at all since there's the risk of prisoners being able to get out of the premises.