Friday, November 18, 2011

I Cussed Out Loud

For 99.9% of the night, it was pretty good. Things went well. Nobody got stupid. Count cleared on time for the first time in three days.

Mainline went amazingly fast. The inmates weren't lingering on the walk and came into the chow hall so fast that the staff inside had to shoo them out so others could find a seat. We fed all of B-side in under an hour from start to finish.

The only real downer was that Meanie developed a migraine and we were too short to let him go home. He sat in the shack in the corner most of the night with his eyes closed and only came out to smoke and when we needed him for something. I gave him the lone Tylenol I had in my lunchbox but it didn't help any.

Poor lil' guy....

All week they have had me scheduled to work the library on Friday.

It's not a bad gig. Very little work involved. Let 45 of them in and shoo the rest away. Then sit and read a book for a couple of hours. Drink some coffee and chat with either of the librarians, both of whom are very nice ladies. When it gets done chase them all out and lock up.

Simple and easy. A great way to end the week.

Well, that didn't last. Some time between this afternoon and this evening they moved me from the library to laundry. And when I saw that I cussed out loud. Repeatedly.

Obviously, I wasn't pleased about working the laundry.

For one thing I haven't been down there in close to seven years or more. Don't have the slightest idea what to do down there. Don't remember how and when they count or when to make releases or anything.

For another thing it's hot and nasty down there and the place is full of lint and it makes my sinuses go crazy.

So I'll be clueless and sneezing in a huge warehouse of a building with over a hundred inmates and three or four square staff and really really cranky all night long. Instead of having polite conversation over tea and scones in the library like I had planned. Pfui.

I was still grumbling about it on our way out to the parking lot with Sgt Uncle T. As he got into the car with Miz T he said "Well, I'm off to enjoy my five day weekend! You have fun down in laundry tomorrow!"

Without any conscious thought, my mouth flew open and I said "Aw, frack you!"

Well, I didn't exactly say "frack" but you get the idea.

I think I shocked poor Miz T. I think most of her opinion of me comes from this blog. And maybe some of the outrageous fibs her husband tells her abut me. It was the first time she actually hear me cuss and I felt bad about it. I should have just leaned in and flicked him on the end of the nose or something.

So, Miz T, I apologize for being a potty mouth. But that husband of yours knows how to push my buttons sometimes. One of us is obviously not beating him enough. I'm going to start carrying a rolled up newspaper when I'm on the yard to keep him in line.

Unless I can induce some poor soul to trade me places I'm going to be cranky all day tomorrow.


Friday is going to be Occult Day, Married To A Scorpio Support Day, Push Button Telephone Day, Mickey Mouse Day, National Vichyssoise Day, and Dedication of the Basilica of St Peter Day.

I've been trying to throw in a "Saint A Day". There's bazillions of them, after all.


  1. I just can't get over the graphic at the top. Pretty nifty, in a ha ha kind of way.

    I wouldn't want to do laundry all day, either, but I don't mind the folding. As long as I have some rock n roll music to accompany me.

  2. Brent- Doing laundry at home doesn't bother me. It's working at the laundry that gets me. For various reasons.

  3. LOL! You had me at "Aw, frack you!" THANKS for your gentlemanly apology though. That's nice. Your wife is very fortunate to be married to such a considerate empath.
    p.s not that I don't think I'm fortunate too. I am.
    err...but boy do I sympathize with you.

  4. Oh, snap. That's a perfect graphic for this blog I read. I think it has "pepper spray" in the title. You should check it out sometime.

  5. Noisyfrogpond- Sometimes I do let my mouth get away from me. I'll try to behave myself in the future. And I kinda sympathize with you, too! (grin)

    CheesyDoug- Aren't you the internet flowchart guru? Everything I know about flowcharts I learned at your knee.