Friday, July 29, 2011

Laughter Is Not The Best Medicine After All!

Ye gads. I'm still sore. I guess you could call it a work related injury, but it's nothing I plan on filing any paperwork over.

I hurt myself laughing.

Gray Ham and I were out front of B-dining patting down inmates as they came out of the chow hall. He was being the silly/serious coot that he always is. He flips back and forth between cracking jokes and chewing butt like flipping a light switch. If you have a butt chewing coming, he will give it to you like nobody's business. If you don't, he'll crack a joke. That's him.

I was bent over patting down an inmate and he came off with a one liner in response to something another inmate said that caught me completely off guard. I whooped and went to stand up and something in my ribs down low on the left side went "Pop!"

I don't know if it was just cartilage or if one rib crossed over another or what, but for a second there I thought I had been shot. It scared me a little but I was still laughing and saying "Ow ow ow ow!" and dancing around in little circles holding my side.

And they all tried their best to make me laugh all night long and succeeded several times. The evil swine.

That was close to seven hours ago and my ribs still hurt.

I can just see that accident report going up the chain and the snarky comments that I would get back on it.

No thank you. I don't want to be the first officer in the department to be officially ordered not to laugh at work.

Then again, I would love to have that in writing, just to hang it on my wall.

Anyway. I'm 2-10 down in the Hive again tomorrow. They do love doing that to me on my Friday. I'm not so crazy about it myself, but at least I get to start my vacation early.

So Friday will be Cheese Sacrifice Purchase Day. Apparently if you have mice in your home you have to sacrifice some cheese in the traps to be rid of them. And Friday is the day you purchase that cheese.

I think somebody was smoking the Liquid Wrench when they thought that one up!

It will also be Lasagna Day, Lumberjack Day, Rain Day, National Talk In An Elevator Day and Systems Administrator Appreciation Day.

Good thing it aint Tell A Bad Joke Day! I couldn't take it....


  1. Get better soon! I would offer a balloon of sorts, but I have yet to figure out how to shove one through my screen. As for worrying about me, I am so normal (in a strange way) that it hurts as much as a tweaked rib.

    "grater" captcha word
    A sliding scale used to measure the accuracy of the rating system.

  2. Scott- As far as my experience with you goes, I would rate you "FFN" for "Far From Normal". My kind of people.

    The grater rates the raters? Yeah. Sooner or later.

  3. I really want a shirt with that picture on it. That's the sort of thing that would give the people at work 2nd, perhaps even 3rd, thoughts about irritating me.

  4. Bryan- I used that line a few times at work tonight. The crew in the Hive got it, but nobody else. Ah, well.