Monday, March 1, 2010

Revelations And Aggravations

It was a good day to have Elvis Costello songs running around in my head. They have a way of chasing the bad stuff out, or at least relegating them to the background of my thoughts.

The rest of my head was full of snot. Between that and Elvis, there wasn't alot of room left for conscious thought.

Probably a good thing, as it turns out.

On the way I someone says "I heard they had a 10-5 down at your house this morning. And one the morning before. Whatinell is going on down there?"

I just shrug my shoulders. "Dunno. I been out sick."

Turns out that Lolas new boyfriend was being too demanding and when she (she/he/it = sheeit) tried to check out, the boyfriend took her hostage in the cell.

Fun times.

Then this morning they had to take one of our more unstable wobbleheads (who was on suicide watch at the time) on outcount to court. He apparently resisted being taken out and had to be thumped about a bit to get him to cooperate.

Any other kind of outcount or transfer, they don't go if they are on suicide watch. But if a judge demands their presence, they are going whether they are foaming at the mouth or covered in poop or whatever. The only way to get out of going to court is if you are actively dead. And even then they might drag them there anyway, just to satisfy the judge.

Hell, I have met a few of the local judges. They scare me. If they want something, I'd give it to them.

I ask BG on the way down to the house "What did I miss?"

He just says "Nothing much."

It's his way.

But as the evening progresses I find out that they had one mild use of force and almost a couple more on the same offender. And I hear about the hostage situation and the deal with the wobblehead.

Lots of little things and close calls. As BG says "It's building up. Something is probably going to happen."

I hate it when he says things like that. He's usually right.

And to top it all off, Miz Maybe calls in sick and they stick Chucky up in the bubble, instead of down on the floor where he belongs. They send us Inspector G and some loud useless new guy to work the floor.

The Inspector is fine for working in a regular housing unit. He pries into all of the corners and prowls about keeping them in line. Down in the Hive we tend to overlook some of their silly behavior and ignore their antics as long as they don't get out of control or cross certain lines. He wants to write violations for running their mouths.

Dude, just for the record, you couldn't write enough violations to get them all to shut up. Trust me on this.

The loud useless new guy was just loud and useless for the most part and didn't have a clue what to do. And when he was told what to do, he either ignored what he was told or screwed up what he did.

Actually, I think he may have passed out the mail without any major blunders. That was a plus.

Poor Sgt Miz P kept looking at me and saying "Revvy, I feel like I'm working with idiots!"

I would smile in a reassuring way and pat her gently on the shoulder and reply "You are."

I'm good at moral support like that.

So I'll leave you with a line from "Oliver's Army" which seemed very apropos and kept running through my head all evening:

"And I would rather be anywhere else but here today........"


  1. I'll be back Wednesday if that's any help. Stay safe and watch out for camera 8.

  2. Purple Stuff- Get better and get back. And that loony is in seven now.