Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Blogging To The Oldies Pt 2

Criminally Insane

There's a place we all fear. Most people don't think about it much in the front of their minds, but the fear is usually there, just the same. In the old movies it was always the "Asylum for the Criminally Insane." Always surrounded by big fences and concrete walls and old gnarled up trees. Something bad always happened there and the place is always haunted. Like Arkham Asylum in the Batman comics. Just getting near the place you could hear the screaming and moaning and the closer you got you could just feel the crazy oozing out of the place. It was a place you would scare people with because everybody just knows once you go into that place, you are never coming out again. Local kids would dare each other to touch the fence and then run away as fast as they could. A bad place. A scary place. A place you never hope to go.

The place still exists. But they are usually alot cleaner and brighter and less scary, at least on the outside. They are either a hospital attached (if not inside) a prison or a prison attached to a hospital. They are an adjunct of each other. This is where we send those who are too crazy to be in a regular prison population. And if you've ever seen any even remotely realistic prison shows, you have to be mighty crazy to merit a place in this august establishment. I always say "riding a bicycle upside down underwater crazy" but that doesn't even cover it. Those people are old hat out on the prison yard. And what exactly do they do in these places? Truthfully, I haven't the foggiest. Sometimes inmates go there and when/if they come back, they are better for awhile. But just for awhile. Then in a couple of weeks or so, here we go again. They are out of control and in trouble and back in my hands again. And I have to keep them from hurting themselves or someone else. But sometimes....sometimes... they come back even crazier than when they left! They come back with the crazy just dripping off of them and foaming at all of the orifices and hand them off to us to deal with. And someone says "Mr. So & So is coming back from the hospital.. They say he hurt one of their staff so they are sending him back." Well now..... isn't that why we sent him there in the first place????

Do we really know that little about how our minds work?

Originally posted 9-12-2008.

Obviously I was having some issues with the wobbleheads back then.

So far I have done very little during my vacation. It's been too hot to go outside and work unless I get up real early in the morning.

And those of you who have been reading this nonsense for awhile know what kind of a morning person I am.

I need to mow my lawn and I need to cut a strip of wood to go from the carpet to the tile in my office. I also need to paint my trim and put it back up. But so far I have done none of those things. It's too dang hot and I'm too dang broke to afford any paint.

I am, however, getting caught up on my reading. That's always a plus.

Tomorrow is National Watermelon Day. Sounds like a plan. Some ice cold watermelon and stay the frack inside 'cos it's too hot.


  1. I used to think I would like to work at a crazy house, but then I seen House on Haunted Hill and changed my mind! What possesses a person to decide they want to work with the criminally insane? I think it takes a bit of insanity to even want to be around those poor whacked out souls. My security word is mouspit.....mouse pit? Hahahahaha

  2. You are a great writer!
    I'm really enjoying your posts.

    Thanks for giving me the 411 on the Hive, in your last post. (much appreciated)

    I'm also having a little chuckle about FlyinMonkey's security word comment...it cracks me up sometimes when I see the words that come up...and in a weird sort of way they seem to relate to either the post or my comment...too bazaar!

    Anyway...chill about not getting to your "house work" you are, after all, on vacation! So, sleep in, and relax!
    The lawn and painting can wait...see, wasn't that easy! (you can blame it on me if it doesn't get done, okay!)

    Cheers, Jenny

  3. That opening paragraph really set a mood. Nice.

    And yes, sending them BACK after they hurt someone doesn't make much sense. Don't they have more options to restrain someone dangerous than you do? Can't they, say, strap them down and pump them full of nice sleepy-time drugs?

  4. Sounds like you have been in my "writing" room that doubles as the man-cave. People have been known to come away hurt in some fashion. It's that damn Pen...safe word is pruchale...sounds like a french wine.."Your Pruchale is coming, sir."

  5. Help! I can't pronounce the safe word! Curse you Scott!!

  6. FlyinMonkey- 13 Ghosts was the one that got to me. I walk through a wing and listen to the screaming and the babbling nonsense and I start looking for the big clockwork doors and stuff. I just hope I have the right key...

    Jenny- Sorry, I get caught up in my own head sometimes. I forget everybody doesn't work there. Even though I'm remarkably good at not getting stuff done I still feel guilty..

    Bryan- That was back when I still thought I was a writer. I kind of miss that. And no, sending them back to us makes no sense. They are a mental hospital, we are not.

    Scott- I know the pen is the key. I just can't remember how to open the box!

    Bryan- It's pronounced Proo-shawl. With the accent on the second ...ummm... thingamajig. Whatever those things are that two part words are made up of. Cilia? No, that isn't it. Damn...