Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Free Food! Yum!

Every couple of months or so they have what is called a "catered event" for one group of inmates or another. It's usually one of the religious groups. They order in a bunch of food from some place local and they have a get together in the visiting room sponsored and supervised by one of the chaplains.

The money for these comes from the inmate canteen fund. When inmates buy things at the canteen they get charged a certain percentage over cost. I'm not sure what the percentage is, but it's much lower than what we pay out on the streets. A percentage of that percentage goes into the canteen fund, which is then disbursed to various activity directors throughout the state. It pays for the cable they watch and the recreation equipment and library books and things like that.

Some of it is set aside for the chaplains who use it to buy books and musical instruments and once in awhile food for these events.

Nine times out of ten the inmates devour every scrap of this food. Heck, I don't really blame them for that even though I grumble about it. Most of the state food in the chow halls is bordering on nasty.

But tonight apparently not as many inmates showed up as they thought so there was a bunch of stuff left over. After the service the chaplain wheeled a cart out to the front desk and said "Here ya go! help yourselves!" and he left.

Yum! Boneless BBQ chicken wings. Chicken strips. Fried fish. Potato wedges. Lasagna. Rolls. Cake. Soda and a couple of pies. Wow! We hit the jackpot.

The Control Center crew fell on it like a pack of wolves. Me and Brother D and the weird little dude at the front desk all got plates full. Even Chuck in the other P-car got fed. I suspect that a bit of it got tucked away and taken home for later.

I ate some chicken wings and a couple of rolls and some taters and saved the dinner I packed in for tomorrow. What the hey? I just got a pretty good dinner for free. That just doesn't happen very often around here at all.

And I got a chance to reinforce the fact that I don't belong in the control center. Vinnie asked me to help out while he took care of something outside. So I went up with Ms Odd and kept her company until he came back. Unfortunately for her, she decided to try and do the radio check while I was up there. While she was on the radio I was in the background making weird noises and strange comments and giving her the giggles.

I don't think they'll ask me up there again any time soon.

So I guess the chaplain did a grouch a favor today. That was good. I wasn't really all that grouchy to start with, but I would have pretended to be for more of that chicken. And tomorrow is Champion Crab Races Day.

Champion crabs? I'm not sure...... Do they mean..... Wouldn't you just...... How do they.....

Oh never mind.


  1. I always liked making sheep noises in the background while someone else is on the radio. Makes people wonder, WTF? Baaaaa, baaaaaa......

  2. Wow, that's good sounding stuff. Why would they pass up any of that? I'm not even in prison and I would go out of my way to get some of that food. I'm hungry now...

  3. Bad Actor- I'll remember that next time. If they ever let me up there again. They should know better, tho...

    Bryan- They ate what they could in the time they had and weren't allowed to take any back with them, so we got what was left over for a change. That almost never happens and i took advantage when it did.

  4. Ah, then I should suggest maybe steaks or something with lots of mozzarella cheese on it next time; you know, something that's time consuming to eat. Of course, I'm guessing that maybe stuff like steaks are out because they involve sharp knives. How does that work?

  5. Bryan- Nothing with bones in it except chicken. Anything that needs to be cut, like a cake, has to be pre-cut. Any food has to be able to be eaten with the fingers or a soft plastic spork. And they wouldn't be able to afford steak that was worth eating anyway.