Showing posts with label little big man. Show all posts
Showing posts with label little big man. Show all posts

Monday, December 21, 2009

I'm Not A Big Dude

I was watching an episode of "Lockup" on MSNBC the other night. They were showing the Adseg unit in some prison somewhere. All of the staff there looked like bodybuilders. Most of the guys had upper arms the size of my thighs and the one woman they had on their crew looked like she could take Rocky Balboa in a single round.

Me, I'm 6' tall and weight 185 pounds. I'm not a weightlifter. I work out with 5 pound weights when I do work out, looking for more tone than mass. Just trying to keep in a little shape and not get flabby.

As Sgt LB pointed out, except for Ms Maybe up in the bubble, I'm the smallest guy on the crew. Heck, she might even have me by a few pounds, but I wouldn't even suggest that to her face. I suspect that Big Mess might have the spot for biggest with BG right behind him. It would be close and I would hate to see those two arm wrestle. I'm sure the table wouldn't survive the bout. Even KP has me on height and size. Not bad for an old fart.

But as Sgt Brigadier pointed out the other day when he was down in the Hive, it's not what you can do, but what you will do. I have seen great big guys who weren't work a tinkers damn in a scrap. I, however, have the tendency to dive right in to a dustup, heedless of any possible consequences.

I'm sure that is going to get me seriously hurt one of these days.

But on the other hand, the offenders know that even though I am not the biggest guy on the crew I am the one most likely to introduce someone to Officer Concrete. If I am going to get into a mess, I want it to end as quickly as possible and they know if they go up against me they are going to end up getting all banged up. I don't fool around when it comes to that sort of thing. If I have to put my hands on one of them, it's usually going to go bad.

After a use of force, the Lieutenants and Captains always want to second-guess what we did. "Why did you do it that way?" My answer is always "It needed to be done and I did it the quickest way I could think of. It needed to stop and I stopped it."

That doesn't make me a bada**. I don't really like having to do it. For the most part.

I just like to be efficient, I guess.