Telling on Myself

Sometimes I am such a buffoon that I wonder that they even keep me employed, let alone promoted me.

Maybe just for entertainment, because when I do stupid things I always tell on myself.

I went out back of the house to have a smoke and a cuppa coffee. They'd recently harvested one of the garden plots and toted the stuff off to a local food pantry and then reseeded the plot again. I didn't know they had reseeded it, the plot just looked like bare dirt, but there was a sprinkler in the middle of that dirt, whisking away and turning the plot into mud.

I walked out further to look and got kind of engrossed in watching the action of the sprinkler. How that little arm hits the stream of water and bounces back and the motion of the counterweight rotates the sprinkler head and then the spring sends it back into the stream of water again.

It's freaking brilliant. And so simple. But brilliant, nonetheless.

Even just the sound of it is iconic. You could play a recording of that noise to almost anybody in the world (anybody with a lawn or a crop, anyway) and they would know that it's a sprinkler.

I was even enjoying watching the little spray of water that shot off the side of the stream whenever the arm hit it. I just stood there and enjoyed the moment.

When the first drop of water hit my boot I had just a brief second to think "Really?"

Then "Blat! Blat! Blat!" I get nailed by the water. It puts my cigarette out and splashes right into my coffee, immediately making it too cold and weak to finish.

With water droplets all over my face and glasses, I turn around to make sure nobody is out there to see. And I scan the windows to ensure there are no hysterically laughing inmates either.

It cooled off everything but my face, which was mysteriously red for a few minutes.

I think from now on I'll do my sprinkler watching from a distance.

So, to change the subject... Sunday is going to be Cheese Sacrifice Purchase Day. Look that one up. It's also going to be Lasagna Day, National Chicken Wing Day and Rain Day.

I've had my rain already, thanks.